December 2009
14 posts
see more Epic Fails
You know, the longer I live, the more I realize just how much of life is about timing. And also, that people will drift back into your life when you least expect it. Life is so much more random than I ever believed when I was younger.
“Without music, life would be an error.”
– Friedrich Nietzsche
How true.
Just had a very painful end to an evening. I was watching the second season of The Office (British version) and there is a couple there who are not together, but the tension between them is very obvious. I asked the person I was watching it with if the two ever get together as I know their counterparts do on the American version. He said to wait and see. I sat there awkwardly as the sound went off...
“I have a theory. The dinosaurs died because there was a huge fire and they lived...”
– The comedic gold (crap) that I come up with whilst stoned
“You’re sheets have taken quite a beating. You’ll have to get a rubber mattress.”
– Mom after a bestie threw up. ;) (via incomedyshetrusts)
Oh god…. you know you have an awesome friend when she forgives you and doesn’t say anything, even after you puke on her bed and she cleans it up.
Come to think of it, if I ever get remarried I think I’m going to put that in...
“Hey how r u i was woundering and u can say no since we already sletp togeter...”
– Via text message from the guy I went on one date with, several hours before what was to be our second date. This was after I told him that I wanted to take things slower in the future as I wasn’t totally comfortable with how fast things had gone on our first date. Classy. So classy.
You know what honest to god scares me the most? That it’ll never ever happen between us. That I’ll wait and wait and wait till my life runs out and I’ll never have the chance to experience being with you. That terrifies the fuck right out of me.
Regarding the slip and slide water walking contraption seen at the YMCA today:
Me: Maybe that was what Jesus was walking on in the Bible.
J: Oh yeah, they just edited the slip and slide part out.
Me: Yeah, it's totally possible you know.
J: Yeah, for sure. And they thought it would be cool to make a story about a guy living in a fish.
Me: Definitely. But seriously, maybe Jesus really did have one of those things, took a few steps on it, and you know people just edited that bit out.
J: Hmm... I don't know that seems kind of important.
Me: Well you know how it is, they didn't write those books until like at least a hundred years later. Something could've gotten lost in the telling. I mean, have you ever played telephone?!? Seriously.
J: That's gotta go in the blog, E. If you don't write it in, I will.
So here ya go J, I dusted off the old tumblr just for you. ;)
Me: Yeah, I just don't see how I'm ever going to get a boyfriend unless I move away.
Mom: But you don't want to leave P-town.
Me: I know. It's just that all the good quality guys here are either gay or taken. The gay guys are great though. It's not fair to women.
Mom: Well, you know, relationships don't last as long anymore.
Me: I know.
Mom: So maybe some of these guys will be looking for girlfriends again in the future.
Me: I guess, yeah.
Mom: That's about all you can hope for.
Me: Thanks Mom.
Pseudo - Boyfriend
So my friends and I have been on and off discussing my relationship with the [current] love of my life, and the inconvenience of his girlfriend. Today while in the car though my friend hit the nail on the head (Thanks InComedySheTrusts) in her definition of our relationship.
We’ve all heard of friends with benefits (good lord only knows I’ve heard too much about that...